I look at my children a lot. Take in their facial features, their beauty, their innocence…because I know how fleeting time can be. They’ll be grown up before I know it, and I’ll be missing the days when I could hold them in my arms without their protest.
Yesterday was no exception. We were eating our lunch outside, when a thought occurred to me about how blissfully unaware they are about our world.
And at that moment, I was scared. Scared that anyone may want to harm them….either physically or emotionally. Granted, I’m always a worry wart about my girls. Even before they were born, and still a part of me, I worried then. But yesterday, was a different kind of anxiety.
I had a conversation with my dad earlier this week, while watching the girls play at McDonald’s, and we discussed my apprehension about their teenage years. I told him that I wasn’t worried so much about the bad decisions they’d make, but rather, the friendships they will forge.
I’m scared that they’ll befriend someone who doesn’t value family. Someone who’ll be a negative influence…who’ll deliberately hurt them, who’ll manipulate them…someone who’ll shake their confidence rather than bring them up.
And at that moment, I wanted to put them in a bubble. To protect them from all those people. To keep them in my happy love bubble. Away from harm. But then I had a scary realization….
I can’t.
There were times in my past when I encountered less than desirable types of people. And while I think I handled those situations to the best of my ability, I know I could’ve done better.
Been stronger.
Known better.
And that’s what I want for my children. To be strong in times of conflict, and possess great strength in confidence. To have the knowledge that positive company is the best type of company to keep.
And in order for me to teach that to them, to let them learn for themselves…I have to burst my bubble.
As much as I want to protect my girls, trying to protect them by not exposing them to life is actually hurting them.
My girls are growing older. My youngest keeps telling me that she’s not a baby, but rather a “mermaid.”
I hope they don’t swim too far away, too soon.
xo, Louise
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Oh my goodness! That picture is priceless. How tiny, beautiful.
My thoughts mirror yours (in fact, my post yesterday was very similar in theme to your feelings here). Life passes quickly, we do the best we can. Realizing that my kids are only w/ me for a short time helps to keep things in perspective.
You’re a wonderful mom, Louise.
Thx Janae =) I just read your post, and I’m gonna comment as soon as I can steal some time away. Thx for your understanding. I’m glad I can share my thoughts and worries with you =) XO
That is what I would worry about most with my children. Who they are going to interact with. I wouldn’t want anyone to harm them or belittle them, or shut down their confidence. But you are right that things like that are going to happen, and putting them in a bubble would keep them from building the “tools” they need to respond adequately in those situations.
I know that this is something that I will struggle with when my husband and I have kids of our own. Growing up, I had an incredibly close and amazing relationship with my mom, and because of her influence on me and knowing that I ‘deserved’ nice friends, and nice relationships, I cultivated those friendships and those relationships at a very early age. There were definitely people that hurt me and I know that along my way, I hurt people, too; but I was always very well aware of the fact that my mommy loved me, forever. You are such a great role model for your girls — they will gain strength through you and find their way into healthy relationships because that’s what has been modeled for them.
Well said. You have to trust that you’ve given them a strong foundation and that their own experiences in life will make them even stronger….